My views on potential Oiler goalies via trade

and before "Smyth2Hemsky" steps in and starts crying like a bitch that I'm not a fly on the wall and "how dare I say anyone is on the trading block".... we'll go with assume they are on the block, due to all word out of any NHL news.

And before the same clown cries about "assuming" let's just clear the air for the bitch and give him a dictionary definition:

as·sume ( P ) Pronunciation Key (-sm)tr.v. as·sumed, as·sum·ing, as·sumes
To take upon oneself: assume responsibility; assume another's debts.
To undertake the duties of (an office): assumed the presidency.
To take on; adopt: “The god assumes a human form” (John Ruskin).
To put on; don: The queen assumed a velvet robe.
To affect the appearance or possession of; feign.
To take for granted; suppose: assumed that prices would rise. See Synonyms at presume.
To take over without justification; seize: assume control.
To take up or receive into heaven.


OK?

Good. Goalies to supposedly available and my take on their validity on the Oilers:

Jose Theodore [MTL] - great goalie, fell out of favour in Montreal management. Former Hart winner having a tough year under the most intense scrutiny of any NHL city. He has great positioning, great awareness, and proven NHL allstar, I have no problem with Theodore in Edmonton. The rumour holds Shremp would have to go, but small price to pay for a goalie that can not only steal you a game, but a playoff series.

Andrew Raycroft [BOS] - 03/04 Calder Winner. Another Jim Carey? Why assume this shit? Because he's a Bruin? He's on the most brutal team in the NHL for letting shots on net, only since Stuart came into play they've tightened up. Chicago's Anderson was picked up today by the Bruins, so if anyone - expect this guy. And for Raffi Torres, who gives a shit? We have other prospects coming up and Raffi can disappear for months on end. Better to trade him to the East than West

Marc Andre Fluery [PIT] - Pipe dream, but Craig Patrick has shown his man love for all players "proven". Hell this muthafucka signed Thibault, a continual loser in his career, instead of handing the reigns to Fleury. He'll trade anyone, anywhere. The NHL's new Milbury. Rumour of Laraque, Bergeron and a 1st... take it, but they just got Cairns, lost the salary of Palffy... so this will never happen.

Marc Denis [CBJ] - there's a lot of hype around this kid. But there has been for how many years? And if he's not the #1 in Columbus, a shitty team by anyones standards - why would he fit in here, and not be their #1?

Dwayne Roloson [MIN] - A nobody who plays behind the trap. His numbers speak to this.

Manny Fernandez [MIN] - See above.

Martin Biron [BUF] - A quality goalie who should by all means be Buffalo's #1 guy by now. Backup to Hasek, but due to spectacular play by Ryan Miller on the #2 spot again. Teams are bidding big for him, and the Oilers would give up too much. Pass.

Miika Noronen [BUF] - Another 1st round pick goalie by the Sabres riding the pine... or rather the comfy press box. He wants out, he's a great goalie with great potential. The Sabres have no use for him and he wants out - take this fucking guy. Cheap and ready to play. Edmonton's answer to Kiprusoff? Probably not, but worth that shot.

Patrick Lalime [Waivers] - Yeah he sucked in St. Louis, but who wouldn't? Worst team in the NHL giving up the most shots a game. This is still the same guy who carried the Sens to #1 in the East Conference on a worse team than they have ahead of Hasek.... and #1 in the NHL in the same situation. What ever happened to second chances? I say if Lowe wants to be a cheap prick - this is it.

Felix Potvin [Free Agent] - desperate move.

Mike Morrison [Edmonton Oilers] - what? We don't have to make a move for this guy? Well... fuck it's time to let him play as a real #1 goalie and see what happens. 6 and 1. Single handed win over San Jose tonight. Why not give this kid a chance and say "he's our #1 guy"? He earned it.