Oct.7/05 Game - Calgary vs. Columbus

Ok, it was the only game on cable tonight. Flames/Bluejackets. Whatever.

First thing I noticed is Calgary is a fucking slow team. Flat footed and boring. Nobody on that team has any hustle except Iginla, Langkow, and Lombardi. Reinprecht showed up for 5 seconds, but besides that I forgot he was even a Flame.

Ok, and God Bless you Iginla, but you got to stop telegraphing that one fucking shot. Go down the right side, and lift the leg up to snap it on net. The moment you lift that leg up the goalie knows you're going to shoot. It's moronic buddy. Kind of like Ryan Smyth's left wing slap shot. Goalies get a book on you man, why do you think Smyth went from sniper to 15 goals a year?

Sportsnet. Come the fuck on. Come on. What's the deal? It's been over 5 years since you got on the air but still haven't learned to turn up the game sound just one octave? You can't hear shit. It's not the boring ass Columbus crowd, it's you. TURN IT UP.

And Roger Millions needs to go. How depressing is a Sportsnet game with that droning on play by play. The guy has no emotion. Jesus Christ, where was Sportsnet when Chris Cuthbert was up for grabs? Most irritating play by play in the media. I'd think the Buffalo, Pittsburgh or Rod Phillips radio announcers would be more than happy to take a pay hike to go on a national broadcast. Anyways Sportsnet sucks, back to the "action".

What a sleeper of a game. Columbus has no PP. I mean David Vyborny is your QB? I thought the Oilers sucked at this, Columbus just put them to shame. They can't pass, their blueline can't shoot, Delmore is a bust..

Finally a goal, Donovan snaps home a cheap one. Still a yawner of a game.

Columbus blew on the PP, Calgary wasn't much better. They had Chris Simon out there on their 2 man advantages, the new rules should dictate he'd be helpful, but with all the ice in the world, he still has hands of stone. Fuck him. Calgary won't score with him on the ice.

Gilbert Brule!! One good shift, one shot..... denied. Never noticed him again. If I was Columbus, send the kid back to Vancouver for another year, he's not ready for the primetime.

Sean Donovan.... sharpen your fucking skates. It's free in the NHL, you have a trainer. There's no excuse for playing 9 out of every ten seconds of your shift lying on your fucking back. You looked like Bambi hitting the ice. Get a fucking brain dude. Seriously.

Anyways, Calgary wins in a boring game. Darren McCarty was garbage in the first 2 periods, all he did was dump the puck in. Over and over. He also needs to cut that stupid chin hair, it's retarded, you're fooling nobody. But in the last 10 minutes he played like McCarty of Detroit, clizzutch. He put the game away. Clutch.

Stars of the game:
CGY - Daymond Langkow - solid on the backcheck, excellent passer, one goal, one assist. Him and Iginla are going to be danger. Believe that.

CBJ - Marc Denis - if it wasn't for this bust of a draft pick, Columbus would have gotten their asses handed to them.

Retards of the game:
CBJ - Duvie Westcott - what the hell kind of name is that? You'd think growing up with that name he'd grow some balls to overcompensate. Instead he was like a deer in headlights, scared to touch anyone. Excellent passer though, to the other team. Every breakout pass I saw, he sent it straight on a Flames stick. AHL player only in the league due to expansion.

Fan - that fat bastard that was a reject from "the Biggest Loser" on NBC. Painted "Go Blue Jackets" on his fat stomach, irritating enough to see him flop that around, but even more moronic.... he spelled Blue Jackets wrong. "Go Blue Jakets". Some people need to be put down.

Verdict: Calgary is overrated, Columbus really sucks. Sportsnet is worse than them combined.